Young Hearts

Do you remember your first crush?

I do. It was this silly boy in my class, I don't know his name now...he was cute, I think. It was sheer pleasure when I look at him and frankly, I think that crush was just on looks. Shallow me, I was eight la.

Then I remember an intense one, I was in primary five. It was a rather short but very brainy boy from another class. I can't remember exactly how I got to know him but all I know was I read his articles that got published in the local school papers, I got so obsessed with his intelligence and his articulate mind in papers (then I heard from others that he stutters). I wrote him a letter (I don't where I found the nerves to do such a thing back then, I guess I've always had it) asking to be his friend. He replied and we exchanged a few letters after that, I would read his letters again and again, I guess now I can say I was attracted to the person on papers. We never got to know each other better for some reason I can't remember but I remember going to his house once and his mom was really nice to me and my girlfriends.

I went on to have many other crushes on mainly one type of male, the slightly weird ones, some of them look a bit `off mainstream' but they all have the x-factor, hard to explain what it was.

On Friday night I met a twelve-year-old (at a 6-year-old birthday's party) who had a 3-hour crush on me, we had a really nice chat `by the chips (Lays, sour cream and classic)'. My jaw was on the floor because he had a mobile phone and we talked like twins!! His speech was matured and I guess he was fascinated with the fact that a scantily-dressed 28-year-old female would give him (mind you, a minor) the attention I gave him. He hang around me for a while when my ADULT friends arrived, he then disappeared into the karaoke room, then re-appeared to beg me to join him in the singing.

By then I was a little embarrassed by his attention (cradle-snatcher!) but at the same time believe that I can persuade him to not surf a porn site by going through the theory of `forbidden activity makes a boring activity seems exciting' with him again. CT saw it and said in a straight face: "I think you should sing with him, you wouldn't want to crush a young man's heart and leave his ego crushed for the rest of his life."

Affected by CT's words (she has the ability to make fun of funny situations with heavy thoughts), I took his hand and said: "All right let's go jamming! I'll sing one song and then I'm out of there."

I picked `Unforgettable' over `Hotel Carlifornia' and one other song I can't remember.

Then when he was leaving with his mom and his little sister, I remembered I have forgotten to give him my card, so that we could email and exchange more `conversations that was beyond other 12-year-olds' --- don't get me wrong, we were talking philosophy, not porn.

Really, I'm not as bad as you think I am.

Party Animal

I think I found my new calling last night....I'm a party hostess.

Like fish in water, I was laughing through my job last night at a work party, organised to make some companies happy. After ST told me that he thinks I secretly aspire to live in the episodes of Sex And The City, I keep having images of myself talking as Samantha Jones...like last night was the perfect episode of my pilot episode in the hit series, as Samantha JL, the tall (I wish), sexy and elegant PR person who makes all the parties alive. I even got the dress right, as Samantha...but I didn't bring any waiter to bed.

That's it, I can really imagine myself as a party-organiser, the one everyone talks about with great fondness because I put them on the guest list. I have thought about getting into the event management industry briefly...years ago but never imagine it to be something I'd do to pay rent, these days I consider two options for earning a living:

1. Get a job in an industry where my heart is and let work be passion, and passion is my work

2. Get a job that pays and support me, financially and let my passions fill up my free time after work

How many people you know are already in group one?

Anyway, coming back to my party last night...

Running parties can really slim you down, you will not touch any food till all your guests have gotten their share and when you do eat, you will be eating crumbs, and stop after two bites to attend to drunk guests and waiters.

And when it's all over, you are too guilty to be pigging out at 12 midnight...so I had a lousy ice-blended chocolate.

The bill came up to 2k more than we budgeted...looks like the next party will suffer a bit.

Know any good place for booze and finger food for 5k? 80 folks, let me know la.

I finally hit the sack with the slow hum of my tum-tum orchestra stringing the [Hunger Pangs in A Minor].

Nowadays

a blogger I admire - Mr D and I had this exchange over the net yesterday...blogging is a reflection of our lives these days, everything fast, immediately technology, fast food, fast marriages, fast food, fast communication, emails, faxes, dating agencies...

I don't want to spend my next ten keeping in touch with friends through reading their blogs and chatting over MSN, I want to see them sometimes...

Anyway, Mr D and my conversation -

Mr D: just thought i'd tell you that i am enjoying your blog, you write very interestingly

Me: goody, thank you. can i tell you again? that MADE MY DAY! Coming from you. oh, my colleague likes your stuff too.

Mr D: your blog has made me see you in a completely different way

Me: ...? now i'm interested to know what you THOUGHT of me before?

Mr D: hmmm, you are more interesting to me now...not to say that you were not interesting before. i think i would actually enjoy talking with you

Me: oh god

Mr D: is that a bad thing?

Me: no la, i guess most ppl are like that, we all have (whether you like it or not),
some pre-judgement of our friends to a certain level.

Mr D: well, most people think i am nothing much as well...until they read my blog

Me: really!

Mr D: i am more attractive as a blog than i am a human being, :(

Me: so i guess then blogging is a good thing, except the down side is your friends spend time reading our thoughts on the internet instead of goin out with us to know us better

Mr D: yeah, i know what you mean

Me: ....but i guess it's convenient, for this time n age (sad), you can `bond' with friends on internet (without driving out and park, and then meet), like MSN and reading blogs

Mr D: that is sad..., haha, we should only date people who blog and write well :P

Me: analyse this - why are we so busy? how much time do you spend in a week to socialise? or do ppl (you/me) equal socialising as waste of time n unproductive? you know what, i'm goin to blog on this issue

Mr D: yes, totally blog-worthy

Me: answer my question, is socialising important?

Mr D: i think it is, it's one of the links in a chain we call life

>snip<

Mr D, jom pizza?

SEPET premiere

Z said it's a shame that folks who are most likely to pay to watch Yasmin Ahmad's SEPET have all been invited to the premiere.

Yes, we were all there...you name it, the theatre sluts, journalists, actors, music composers, poets, singers, WordUppers, bloggers, students...

We finally settled down by 9:30pm to watch the movie.

I love the acting, the flow, the sound track, the dialogues...but I have to agree with Alfian that some of the elements are too far-fetched. I quote Alfian in his Kakisenireview:

Yasmin Ahmad will, of course, be accused of a rose-tinted utopianism. One function of art is of course to reflect reality as we know it. But another much-neglected function is to propose other realities, to portray the exceptions, because these lead us to imagining possibilities. I think there are parts of Sepet where the sentimentality or grandstanding could have been restrained. But I still believe it represents a landmark attempt at articulating the subject of a multiracial Malaysia.

Like I think Orked's parents are too cool for this background, Seow Loong aka Jason is too cultured a VCD peddler....yes, yes, I know Yasmin is throwing all stereotyping to the drain with her characterization....I quote TV Smith:

In this genuine Malaysian film, Yasmin throws every stereotypes into the kitchen sink - a Malay scholarship recipient, a repressed Baba woman, a bigamous Chinese man, a Melayu Celup, a Chinese VCD peddler, a Tongkat Ali dependent - and even a road safety message. The only person missing is the Bhai guy. Out of it, comes an honest and brilliant film woven around a tragic love story.

source: http://www.mycen.com.my/duasen/230205_sepet.html

After quoting two reviews, I urge that you go to TGV and watch it yourself and decide for yourself.

I wouldn't mind going again with you if you asked me, after all, I didn't pay to get in last night.

Reality Real Life

I feel like a participant in a reality TV show called 'The Speed Daters', except this is not on TV, it's on real life!

The lunch table topic today was reality TV shows...halfway talking I received an SMS on my mobile, man, creeepy, just hours after I blog about him and thought he is out of my life, he has came back to haunt me on my mobile!!

"Can I `fit on your calendar' for dinner tonight?"

(rewind back to Friday's episode of 'The Speed Daters' where I told him that I need to fit other men on my calendar.)

Man.

What is it with me? I shouldn't have gone out to meet him and be so nice (read: civilised) to him. Now I dread telling him that I think he sucks and that I won't waste my time seeing him.

Harsh. Life is harsh.

Any suggestion on how I should reply that offending SMS?

Help. Mega bitch stuck with mega shallow dick-head.

How To Ruin A Date

Weather report:

Ego = High
Mood = Guilty
Health = Sick stomach, too much of good food

High Ego:
Not only I got a all-match on all the three men I ticked `yes' at speed dating last weekend, two of them have asked me out and one of them can't wait to get into my life.

Results:
he was on his way out when he asked to see me again just a day after I met him for drinks. I thought then, when I got his SMS on Friday, that I would focus the evening's conversation to `let's just be friends now'. I was worried of feeling guilty but he made it easy for me....downright easy, by first of all, being painfully shallow, second, by being impatient.

The `date':
He pushed all the wrong buttons, look boy, confident girls usually don't get turned on by you obsessively telling them how attractive they look (again and again, it's not attractive, see wrong button no 3) -- they already know they look good and that's why they are confident and they are confident, that's why they look good...you get the picture.

Wrong button no. two, low self-esteem, when he asked me what type of men I'm into, I replied: 'Smart.' He squirmed and thought out loud that he doesn't think he is very smart.

Wrong button no. three, shallow minded. He told all he wanted in a woman is a slim figure and dark hair. He didn't seem to have spent much time thinking about her other developments like brains and kindness.

Wrong button no. four, too eager. Right after I got home I sent an sms to thank him for the chat and wished him a nice weekend. I got a reply immediately: "nice weekend? Does that mean I won't see you this weekend?"

I said to myself, that's it. The whole evening I tried dropping hints ("Actually I went to speed date for fun, you can't take things in life too seriously."; "I'm usually friends with a guy before we turn serious."; etc ) I guess they didn't work, I guess I will draw him a clearer picture, I sent a reply telling him that I think it's too soon to meet YET again and besides I need to fit other men into my schedule.

That did it, I haven't heard from him since 1am, Feb 19.

Hate that bitch across the table? Just follow what he did and you will be rid of her in no time, like how I got rid of him.

In another story, I got another date-request on Saturday....too bad, the Friday night date left a bad taste in my mouth, I said another day.

Opps, gotta run, shall continue this educational outreach program tomorrow...

Something I Wrote

SM forward me an email from ages ago, the email was from me...can't remember who else I sent that to.

--------email starts----------

LOVE THIS, You should blog abt it.

SM
------- Forwarded message follows -------
hey guys,

some of you missed my concert the other day...this is my `opening' speech, to my song. well, since I didn't memorize the whole thing, I only said what I remembered. I also added: `love makes me wanna live that dream, and singing, is my dream'

Seeming said she was moved by the speech, so I thought hey why not, I'll just share with you ppl la.

Love, to me, is about breaking into happy songs;
And dance across the road instead of walking;
It’s about heightened sensations in our basic enjoyment, like music, food and friends;
It’s about seeing more colors around me;
It’s about wanting to be a better person;
It’s about me oozing with energy for life;
It’s about waking up wanting to live life more than yesterday;
It’s about wanting to dream that dream;
And live that dream, so that the person whom I love and who loves me back, can see me living it.
Love, makes me love life.

-------------email ends-------------

Poem by JW

For a fucking good time
Don't waste your time
With bland jellos
When u can have a sizzling hot jalapeno!

-- by JW

Her idea of a shout for me when I gate crash speed dates, to get more friends.

* This poem will also be used on one of her own design greeting cards. She's starting a greeting card deisgning house.

Girl In The City

Can I have a show of hands of women who responded to strangers chatting you up on a street?

So many things can happen to a woman in a city, some funny, some sweet, some gruesome, some bizarre, embarrassing, etc. I usually record mine down.

Last night...

I made an appointment to meet with M, this guy from the Sat night speed date, one of my matches, and he was the first guy who called up the next morning and asked to meet up.

Hung around KL Plaza main door while waiting for M to appear, was there earlier because I had dinner with SM (Wedding Of The Year Girl). I killed time by snooping around in MNG boutique (ended up with a white shirt). There were two Caucasian guys in the boutique as well, they tried to come in through a glass door that was locked so I gestured to them from inside the store to come in through the other entrance.

Bought the shirt and wandered outside to kill some more time. I must have had this `I'm available, come hit on me' look because the two guys from the store approached me, right there at the entrance of KL Plaza. They said I was so nice to them at MNG shop that they had to come up to me and offer to buy me a drink...I don't know whether it was more embarrassing or flattering, the fact that I was waiting for a stranger I met during speed dating and being approached by two more strangers. I mean, I'm proud to be an easy-going and friendly person, confident and sociable but at that moment I was feeling a little, cheap. Oh, not to mention, M is also a Caucasian.

(Anyway, I talked to two fellas anyway while I continue to wait for bloody M who was late. Both Austrians, one of them said he works in the KL Austrian Embassy and the other was visiting him in the city)

In another incident, JW told me just recently, that, W, a Chinese guy from New York whom we met during our back-packing trip in Hat Yai, got married and is now lecturing back in the US, staying with his new Spanish wife. Fine, but he also told her that I was making passes at him during the Hat Yai trip.

Gee, I don't even remember being attracted to him....so what the hell happened?

(for record, JW wrote back and told him he must have mistaken my friendliness for that)

Ok ok fine, how many of you men out there feel the same way? That I'm ALWAYS making passes at YOU? Speak up! I will change my evil way!

Or is it just the men?

Remember the SPG phenomenon? Some of my closer girlfriends have admitted that they think I look like the stereotype SPG (!!!!) -- maybe that's why, I have the SPC-factor going for me, not too tall, tanned or dark skin, black hair and the F-word: Friendly.

Some say the whites could tolerate me a little better than Chinese (J is Chinese!!!). I didn't think many people think a lady's booming laughter in public is very attractive.

Well, anyway, what happened last night apart being embarrassing to me, was kinda funny. I had a laugh and told myself I have to share this.

Oh, funny -- one of the Austrian guys, the one visiting his friend in KL asked me before they pulled themselves away from me: "So Janet, can I know....you mean you are waiting for that guy friend of yours, to meet up and...just to talk?"

I wanted to say something like: "Yes, I usually talk to them before sex." but thought it would be too damaging so I said: "Yes, just to talk, you know? I like to talk."

He looked bewildered and nodded, "Ya ya, I think you LIKE to talk."

Pluck

I have a guitar!

Learning a musical instrument is such rewarding experience...nothing quite match it, it's harder than most things I like, say cooking, it's easier, putting on make-up, or drawing someone else' eye brows, is easier, than playing guitar.

And the thing is, I imagine, once you learn how to play an instrument, it becomes easier than cooking, putting on make-up and drawing a friend's eye brows.

Sister's spanking new and shiny music school is now in operation, she got me in for this guitar lesson, I had my first class with Mr Omar last night. My studio last night was very cosy but the air-con a little cold.

I had a grand time playing with the kids (niece: Yva, nephew: Julian) and singing [I left My Heart In San Francisco] and [I Just Called To Say I Love You] to the karaoke on one of the Clavinova there.

I continued on my new found excitement at Justin's where he taught me a couple more stuff, like guitar warm up exercise (yes, scales!!!) and a few more chords. I guess from now on my evenings are really going to be busy, and precious.

Fantasia Music Studio

It seems this is will be her home away from the house...the kids have a TV room and hang out place when they have to wait for their parents (yes, it's my sister and her husband's home) to finish work.

All the doors are very stylish matte glass with a huge treble clef design. It's the cleanest music school I've ever been in, the smooth rubber wood flooring feel is very relaxing...yes, you remove your shoes at the shoe-house before you get into the school.

The reception area is nice and bright with a floor length windows with open blinds. In front of the windows is a raised platform with guitars, gongo, drums set on display. Facing the spotless and shiny instruments are ceiling-high matching rubber wood cabinets and glass cabinets with merchandises like music books, accessories and CDs. Next to the glass cabinet it's the door way to the management room where the decor is equally delicious, in there are a grand piano and a business-like (again, matching rubber wood) desk. At the doorway of this room is a 4-feet high wooden giraffe, a slight hint that children will not feel lost in this school.

A TV screens musical performances by world-class music icons, the volume is low enough to serve as background music.

Down the hall are series of matching glass doors leading to small studios for different instruments. Each room is equipped with a writing desk, a piano and chairs. The drums studio has heavier door and three complete drum sets. Then there's a pantry and finally, the bath room and the play room for Yva and Julian, there's a TV, sleeping place and a table.

According to my sis, there are some enquiries on singing classes...I guess I should learn how to teach singing soon.

Fantasia Music Studio is located at:

32-B, Section 20/16A
2nd Floor, Wisma Erika
Paramount Garden
46300 Petaling Jaya

T 7873 8991
F 7873 8992
E fantasia@streamyx.com

Quick Wit

Tips for those (who dare to) going to speed dates:

For ladies -
If you are face to face with a dick-head whom you can't possibly want to chat/impress/date/meet-in-future, you can look him in the eye, not smiling and ask flatly:

"What's your penis size?"

For men -
If you are face to face with a bitch-face whom you know can't utter anything well and good but insults or nasty things like:

"What's your penis size?"

You should smile broadly and slyly and go:

"Big enough for you baby. Now can I fondle your tits?"

-- Courtesy of J.

RM 64.00

I didn't go to Jalan Alor for food last night as I thought I would. After the thunder storm in KL and PJ, Justin managed to take me out in a car to Plaza Damas for some late dinner, 10pm....after I did my laundry and started on a very bad copy of Phantom Of The Opera VCD.

We were the only customers in the restaurant (I forget the name of the place, it's right next to The Dance Space, Swiss Mediterranean food), I saw a flyer that says

Valentine's Day Dinner
RM 79.00
Four-course Set Dinner For Two

We ordered ala carte from the house menu, two starters (farmer's bread n mixed salad with eggs), two main courses (Rosti and Arrabiata sauce pasta), one dessert (Tiramisu) and two drinks (Strawberry and banana shake and iced peach tea).

Nice food, all for RM64.

I was wrong about V's Day dining out, I had a steal!

But the most surprising part of it all is the fact that He asked me for dinner. Sweet. Just sweet.

I Did It

I finally did it, speed dating.

Ten guys, ten minutes each, equals to a very tiring evening. With bad soups and very little dinner to top it off.

I got an sms from the organiser on the morning I was leaving Taiping, reminding me of the date, I realised they ignored my email earlier saying I couldn't make it. Seeing that I would be back in KL in a few hours' time, I called them up and confirmed my attendance along with my girlfriend's who was suppose to have dinner with me that night in KL.

I managed to make quite an impression when I got there, I think, partly to do with the skin-color fitting short dress I decided to wear and that I mistaken two participants for waiters.

Ten minutes to each partner was quite dreary, mainly because most men that evening waited for me to initiate interaction. Many of them successfully bored me to tears but I kept the smile on...thinking it's my fault that I didn't push the right button for them to transform into the more interesting creatures. Maybe I didn't ask the right questions, maybe my tone was too serious when I spoke, maybe...

Before the evening was over, the whole room of men (only ten la) came to know that the three girls and me were friends. We were suitably louder than the rest, the organiser loved me ("I love the way you stir up the event.") -- although I wish she source for more interesting men ("If they are THAT interesting they wouldn't be at this event Janet!" -- ML).

Late that night, actually it was three am in the morning, ML and I jotted down the names of all ten guys from memory. Quite a handful of the men have been to speed dating more than once. We wonder how can anyone pay 60 bucks again and again for bad soups. The other women seem attractive but unfortunately there was no time to mingle with them.

I'm sure you can get more than just future dates from speed dating, if you get to know everyone, men and women.

As miserable as it may seem, I managed to tick Yes to three guys at the end of the evening. At 9am yesterday I got an sms from the organiser, informing that I got three matches from the date.

One has called up yesterday.
One sms a V's day message.
One replied my sms asking for his email add.

......

Happy V's Day to all. Stay at home, save some money.

Sizzling Taiping

Am home!!!

I left KL at 11.30am and pulled into Taiping (Changkat Jering exit) at round 2.30pm and got lost for about 10 mins and finally pulled into my dad's drive way at 3.00pm.

On that day itself I showered three times, on Tuesday five times, yesterday three times, today twice...so far.

My dad is still his same old self, still talks way too loud on the phone and nags at me and my brother. He's got some new interests though -- he's been nursing this sick pup at his work place (a factory) with my mom's medicated tea...some colleague of his brought a few pups to the factory and that guy died two months later...and the other colleagues (and dad) have been caring for whatever's left there...bascially just this pup, Ah Wong. He would take time off from home to visit the pup once a day at the factory. Also, according to my mom, he leaves clumps of rice on the kitchen top for the `resident' lizards to eat too....

What I found in the drawers of my old writing desk:

- Some old Yuki Nishimura cassettes, she was my high school days idol

- Operafest Children's Choir brochure

- An old newspaper cutting (my mom's work) from The Star, it was a show review of Deanna Yusof's show at the RP Club (Hyatt) where I sang as one of her back-up (with lovely Nadia Aljafri) singers. There is a picture of three of us singing in the review and my mom `censored' my cleavage with a black marker pen so that it looks like I was wearing a black top underneath the blue low neckline blouse....

- other stuff I haven't gone through

I haven't had time to drive round town in my car on my own yet....been dying to do that since I got the car. Been quite stoned just staying home, sleep after eat, shower, sleep, eat, mindless TV watching of the same Chinese movies they screen every year, wash dishes, watch my mom cook, shower, eat...

I realised CNY is the only time I spend getting to know my parents again, for the past few years I only been home during CNY. I doubt I would have an easy time with schedules this year for `home-coming' although the fear of losing my parents to old age and death looms in my head.

...enough of that fo now....gotta get home and have dinner with parents.

see ya folks in KL.

Everyone's Talking About VD

What is VD? It could be

Valium Day (Dina Z plans to swallow some for THAT day)

or

Vagina Day (remembering Vagina Monologue)

or

Venereal disease

BUT

this month in particular, it means:

Valentine's Day

WOW, guess what I found when I type `VD' in Google!

Anti-Valentine's Day Central -- full of negative energy, watch out.

Shakespeare & VD!!!

Come on, admit it, as much as we would like tell ourselves (and our friends) that VD is just another (stupid) day and there's no point going out to crowd with the whole of KL, spend on pretentious fancy dinners, and roses -- we are probably in denial. Do not underestimate the power of commercialised media, we've been corrupted for most of our childhood and teenage hood and when we finally get to adulthood it's sometimes too late.

I would like to quote Theroadie who commented on DZ's blog:

my my my look at all this people in denial.. Huuuuaaaahahahahaha..

they are all wishing deep down tht their unromantic bf/husbands buy them at least a teeny weeny little chocolate to nibble..hehehehehe

hucs is a classic case of single woman in denial...behind close doors she'll have a lil valentines shrine..hehehehe

jom lah kita buat mass suicide or orgy...jom jom..hahahaha
Theroadie | Homepage | 02.03.05 - 4:53 pm |

After saying so, I must tell you that I still, yes, I still hope to be different from the main stream....I don't have a date for VD, seeing I can't make it for that stupid speed date on Feb 12th, lagi tarak chance of getting a date (with a man). Justin will be working on VD and at night, I don't to ask to know it.

But, I could be doing something extremely exciting: my mentor girlfriend ML is passing by KL from Singapore, on her way home to northern region. She's asked me if I were free to meet up on Feb 14th the other day on MSN.

I remember a VD many years ago when a boy and I walking the whole of USJ 10 to look for dinner after 9pm and we were both hungry as hell, and I was irritated as hell because most restaurants that night served only SET DINNER which was impossible to find something that didn't have meat n seafood. I remember feeling both annoyed and stressed out.

And I remember last year's VD romantic swim and dinner in Avillion.

It does seem less significant to me these days...when you are older and more jaded, everything seem less significant.. and some things seem more important, like health, girl friends, your parents, money, your car...cat...

I'm A Ladette

There's a shiny-spanking-new coffee machine in the pantry....I thought it would be nice to sip on hot coffee after my not-so-exciting lunch. I made a mug full of hot steamy coffee and I finished it.

Now I'm sick. My throat feels funny and I fee like throwing up.

I don't drink coffee, maybe couple of times in a year, now look at me...puke*

***

I found a replacement passenger to go home with me in my car, my brother cancelled on me yesterday.

She sounds like a really nice and well-bred girl. I'm a bit concerned about how she would get culture shock while riding in SUNNY with me, poor girl, trapped with a foul-mouth driver for four hours...

I suppose I could behave like a lady for four hours?? Speaking of behaving like lady, I saw this reality TV show called From Ladette To A Lady that day and got really sick too. It's about some girls going through a course at the local finishing school and only wins the contest (I don't know what's the price). You see, those few British (n Irish) girls in the show are quite....a sight to watch. I have nothing against women who smoke, drink and burp. But these bunch I saw on TV are quite different, they do all three and manage to look completely, ugly.

I guess I better watch it, I probably already look like them, except I'm smaller in size...and I don't smoke, and get drunk -- though usually people assume I'm drunk for the way I laugh and snort.

Gee....

Ewww....

Speaking of laughing and snorting. Again, I can't make it for YET ANOTHER speed date, because it's on the day when I'm just driving back to KL from Taiping. Good la, that saves the men at the date from me -- hyena laughter and loud snorts. Hehehehe.

These days, I treasure friends who can take me as I am...I have become so comfortable at being myself, it's hard to imagine life without straight-talking (crude), whole-hearted laughing (unladylike), making myself at home (sitting kang-kang), dress for comfort (too sexy) and being expressive (foul-mouth).

But underneath all that, I have a heart of gold, just don't provoke me ok!

My Middle Name is BITCH

I came face to face with a woman whose anger I could comprehend and I just couldn't bring myself to forgive her for her nastiness so I matched hers with mine.

I gotta get back to my Daniel Quinn's Emotional Intelligence.

I was in my condo lift with three other tenants/passengers and the lift stopped at fifth floor, one of them got out, I pushed the `close' button as I was standing next to the control panel. When the lift stopped at nine floor, one other guy got out so that left me and this other woman, so I pushed `close' again, but before the door close again that other woman walked out and the door jerked just after she completely stepped out of the lift.

Gee, I was glad the doors didn't close on her. She got a scare and turned around and looked at me, who is still in the lift, viciously with a visible (and audible) scorn on her face...almost trembling with anger (I swear I saw her shaking, must have been a really bad day for her). Then she shouted at me in Cantonese: "Wei, what's wrong with you? Wouldn't let me get out in one piece?!!"

First thing first, she was so sure that I did that on purpose, pushing for door close while she was getting out; second, she reacted with such brilliant bitchiness (she looked very entertaining), leaving me with no choice but to show her that I was a bigger bitch.

"I didn't know you were going out, B-I-T-C-H!!!" I left the doors closed after I shouted back at her, loud and clear. I saw her face changed and that, I tell you baby, it was priceless. I also heard her kicking at the lift doors twice as my lift went up to my floor. Haha, I hope that helped her cool down...

I guess as much as her, I have a problem of being.....nice to rude people. I could comprehend the fact if I were in her shoes, I would have probably done the same, I would definitely swear more than her, but there in the lift, I just couldn't do anything except being rude back at her. I hate to admit but I am, quite addicted in calling strangers names (idiot, bitch, stupid...etc), mainly in lifts.

Having read the first three chapters of Daniel Quinn's Emotional Intelligence, I guess if I had a higher EQ, I would acted differently, like maybe I would say something to soothe that poor woman burning with rage at such a small situation....though I must say that I can hardly imagine myself being so cool and nice, I think I should aspire to get there....