Runs on food and music, will sing for chips and pasta.

Wednesday, June 06, 2012

thoughts dots dots

"Good things must share."  was what he used to say a lot, and advocate.  I remember with much fondness that he used to encourage sexy wardrobe for his girlfriend, "You look so yummy in these clothes, you should go out like this so other guys can enjoy your beauty - good things must share."

And he offered to lend my beautiful winter jacket to his female colleague for her business trip, "...a good winter jacket should be shared, since you don't need it all the time, might as well make it useful for another person."

This came up when I was ruminating and chatting with Lynn about my philosophy in dealing with insecurity.  I was inviting her to come on my show again to sing a duet with me and as usual, I'd feel slightly terrible of having the guest performer to only perform one song after all the trouble of making rehearsals, going to sound check (not forgetting dressing up and waiting all night for that one duet)..etc.  So I asked.

"Let me know if you wanna sing more songs on the show, am running the risk of having your beautiful singing upstage mine - I'd still ask...because Justin used to say - 'Good things must share.'  So I'd share."

Lynn likes the way that I'm funny.  I know this well I think - the good-natured self-tease to compensate for something less.  I think it works that one is funny on stage, it is pleasing and audience will always be more giving and overlook even if your instrument is less than perfect.

And for peers who are better than me in the craft, I realize am always happy (maybe too happy for my own good) to admit and acknowledge when someone is better than me and I'd be happy to share the spot light with her and not feel threatened.

It feels like...
I am perpetually inspired and motivated to be better than my yesterday, because I always surround myself with peers who are better than myself.  Though, I think with a chuckle, this energized and spirited state of mind does not always transform myself into a super high flying genius artist - but it keeps me in a place where I hardly need to deal with insecurity.

I would gladly and openly tell others that there are many colleagues of mine who are better than me in music.  But I don't loose in the `game' - my strength is in my honesty and transparency.  I think when you get rid of the fear of being the second best on stage you can truly shine in your own shoe - even if it means your shoe is a bit discolored.  I guess this is a case of "I am the best second-best performer on stage - look at me, there's no one quite like me here."

What a load of brain fart here, does any of this make any sense?

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