The Killing Way

I have been a `vegetarian' for the past fourteen years. I'm a `vegetarian' and not a vegetarian because I'm quite flexible with this diet, like when I go out with friends, I could join them in practically any restaurant (when I'm in a good mood) and order my food without meat or sea food in it...

And I eat eggs, cheese and most other dairy products.

So my friends say I'm a cool `vegetarian'. Everyone asks me why, nowadays I say it's my life style and I'm happy with it and have no intention of going back to meat anytime soon.

But you see, it's more than just life style, really. I hate to see animals get killed. I grew up with a strange biasness for animals...when I was about eight or so, I thought to myself that my fellow human beings are protected because we have mom and dad and old people have their children to take care of them; but the poor stray cats and dogs on the streets have to fend for themselves.

Without knowing what God is and whether there is one, I prayed for all the stray animals I saw outside of my home. During Chinese new year when we went to my aunt's house in Ipoh, I got to see the people in my aunt's house slaughtered chickens from their own back yard, it didn't gross me out (I don't get gross out by watching blood) but I felt so sorry for the chickens.

Then came one day when my mom turned vegetarian, in the mid 80's, then me when I was 14...and then my dad, and then my brother. My sister is not a vegetarian today but she prefers the green, I think.

When I first know how to articulate my principle and my opinion I became the defensive kind of vegetarian, always ready for a debate in the issue of this diet. I'm less of that now but I'm more sure that I will always stay away form eating animals, for the rest of my life.

Sometimes my policy becomes a blur when I'm faced with more facts about the meat-eating eco systems in the wild, and the human health relating to obtaining certain nutrients from animal products.

But I think it's total bullocks to say that one can't be healthy on a vegetarian diet. It's sheer stupidity to think that we should consume more tasty meat dishes because:

1. Life is short
2. We will die one day anyway
3. Eat pig brains will make you smart
4. etc

A balanced diet is made up of food groups that provide everything your body needs to stay normal = healthy. There's nothing you can't replace with plant food that you get from animal food...even things like Vitamin B12.

Excerpts from my article To Green Or Not To Green in [Health & Beauty]- May 2003:

"...B-12 is not found in plant foods except when they are contaminated by microorganisms. Vegetarians need to obtain Vitamin B-12 from other sources. This substance is needed for blood formation and cell division and the lack of it can cause irreversible nerve damage.

Vitamin B-12-rich foods: Vitamin B-12 is added to some yeast extracts, Soya milks, veggie burgers, bread and some breakfast cereals, tempeh, miso, and sea vegetables (amount of vitamin B12 present depends on the type of processing the food undergoes)."

But apart from all that facts, I just hate to see animals get killed to become my meals. I'm very happy with my `vegetarian' diet, I'm not missing out on anything in life, if you think I'm a fool...hehe, it's more of your problem rather than mine because I'm happy the way I am.

Lately I have been exposed to a few anti-cruelty to animal campaigns on the internet. The activists' videos of the killings (for clothing and food) is heart wrenching and it really affects you.

Sealing in Canada
Fur farm in China

My parents are now vegans because they say eggs aren't too ideal for their old age. My dad and mom still argue about petty things at home but they are very nice to animals, my dad takes care of this stray dog left in his work place (a factory in Taiping). During my CNY stay my dad would take time off to check on the pup to make sure it was recovering from a cold (he fed the pup medicine the week before)...

Eating shark fin is uncool, potatoes taste better.
Vegetarian diet if done the right way, it's a great way to slim down, just look at me.

All Looks, Just Looks...is that all?

Ok, here's topic for thought for Wednesday...

There's always been too much emphasis on looking good, we are missing the big picture.

It feels weird, coming from someone who spends a lot of time and money on looking good, to say this. But even a `sometime-air-head' like me know there's more than just looks.

I cringed at how my pictures turned out in magazines...only when I'm done with whining over the bad photo I shift my attention to the story written, the content is in the words...not my make-up!!

We generally react to prettier things, I see it all the time. In a car show the skinnier girls would get more attention, fairer girls sells more cosmetics, the cakes in nicer boxes seem tastier, etc.

While we spend more money building what's on the outside, we are neglecting the inside.

Taller buildings but shorter tempers...
Nicer cars but ill-mannered drivers...

Tomorrow I will witness a group of people paying tribute to my girlfriend (amongst few other women) who has done many good things for people around her, who remembers names better than any girl putting on flawless make-up. Her hair is always a little messy, her bag is always over-stuffed with diaries, brochures of Malaysian Nature Society, stories written for magazines...

If anything, I want her to know that people like her for what she is and not for how she looks. There are many shinier, taller popular girls in town (and in society pages) who are also well-liked, but for what? For how they always brighten a party with their perfect hair? My girlfriend also lit up a room, by her personality, not with her shoes.

And her lover sees all that. Lucky guy.

I once lamented to Goddess that I might be a blonde because I love clothes to bits...she said, "No, why should fashion be shallow? It's only shallow if you think that's what it's all about, just clothes and nothing else."

So go think about it. Next time you gasp when you see a gorgeous woman in a nice car, go find out whether she is also nice and intelligent.

Waiting To Exhale

I sang badly on Friday at the La Serenata Musicale. Ran out of breathe singing my Rossini art song, I practically improvised the song, or that line...

Felt like burying myself when I finished, I walked down stage sheepishly and sat on the same row as my coach, I stole a glance at him in the dark and thought he looked like he could kill.

J and IW were there too and J gave his signature comment: "Good girl, very loud this time."

When Peter came on stage the grand's lid was lowered to keep the piano accompliment softer, I realised I sang through my two `breathless' songs with the piano lid up, damn.

Anyway, I don't know where I'm going with this story but I just wanted to report that I thought I did quite shitty on stage but I got surprising feedback I didn't dreamed of...

Coach told me after the show that I did VERY well. Huh?

He said I did well and that I am ready to prepare for the ACTL exam...next year, yooohooo....but huh?

He said what I did when I ran out of breathe was the very proof of my improvement - I modified where I breathed, to save my ass and the song. "This is the real life, things happened on stage...what you did was right. Keep that up and you will do well in your exam next year."

Wow. I really didn't see that coming.

Fine, whatever it is, shitty as I was on Friday, I will rise again...on stage, soon.

Thank you Tracy n Regina for coming.

Then on Sat night Z and I sat in a two hour-long high school singing competition as judges...the talent on stage that night was painfully lacking except for the vivacious and quick FEMALE MC (female is spelled in caps because the male MC suck and was good for nothing...she could have done it alone).

But there was one boy who stood out as having potential as a singer...there were only three boys in the finalist line-up, the other two were what Simon Cowell would call 'very very bad singer, no potential whatsoever..'

But this boy, this Indian boy, the only non-Chinese contestant that night...he's got style and he CAN sing. There were contestants who looked at lyrics copied on their palms, and many singing over the original singers with bad non minus-one music clip, there were some who displayed zero presentation skill...and so many sang wrong lyrics (Song With Most Lyrics award goes to Mariah Carey's HERO)...

Anyway, watch out for more sing-song from Soul Doc, coming soon.

Zhang Zi Yi

Check out the Malaysian Zhang Zhi Yi. She was seen in Batu Caves yesterday morning with a Chinese-Harry-Potter-look-alike...posing in a vintage wedding gown.

I was perspiring under the sun with my point and shoot and occasionally her new digital camera, while trying to avoid getting stomped on by DL who was juggling three cameras. Harry Potter and Zhang didn't complain at all about the sun and were the perfect models for a novice like me.

Zhang Zhi Yi = Connection Specialist
Harry Potter = Witty in both English and Cantonese

The shot started round 9am after lots of downloading of Teluk Intan chee cheong fan, rice cakes and yong tau foo at SM's place, zipping her up in the vintage darling dress, and getting ST aka Harry all suited up...DL and I started snapping away while Cindy worked on SM's veil.

We were the appointed photographers for their wedding pictures...Danny is appointed because he can produce good shots, while I'm in for...maybe you can post your questions at SM herself why I was there.

When we got to the outdoor location (Damai, Batu Caves) it was round 9am, we were dead lucky that the climbing site was deserted when we got there...the only living creatures were the damn red ants, they attacked my feet three times.

We worked through the rolls and disc space in the cameras from 9am to about 11am...slowly the climbers turned up and watched in amazement from a distance. ST was persuaded into some seriously funny poses but I wonder if he would post it on the site.

What I like about the shot:

1. I took some of those pictures
2. It was in batu caves, and not lake garden (again...)
3. The dress is vintage
4. The ring is vintage
5. The abso-fucking-lutely gorgeous flowers didn't cost anyone a cent

Anyway, we continued after lunch at her place where she changed into the sultry Beatrice Looi dress and the Chinese jacket (with songket skirt!!!), with red saree as background.

At three pm, we had about close to twenty rolls of films and approx 400 shots on digital cameras. All these, so much more shots to drool over, and so much more cheaper to produce.

Totally refreshing concept.

Zhang Zhi Yi + Harry Potter = My couple of the year

Party = June 2005

Stay tuned for more reviews on the Home Spun Notes On Love...

Hope

"Let the people who never find true love believe that there is no such thing. Their faith will make it easier for them to live and die."

- Wislawa Szymborska

this qoutation has nothing to do with this post, btw.

For me a way to strife through misery is to be hopeful...hoping when you open your eyes the next morning things will be for better. It always get me through dark times.

And I will see the silver lining in everything...

Why don't you?

Pistachio is Pavarotti - Part 2

Colleague A and colleague B gathered round my cubicle...discussing the renovation in our office.

Out of the blue, colleague B turned to me and said, "Janet, sing."

Colleague A smiled and recalled the other day when colleague C came to my place and told me Pavarotti's nick name - Pistachio...he asked: "Hey Janet what's the name of that Italian singer?"

Colleague B turned to him and said: "Paparazzi?"

I rest my case.

The Best Bestseller I Have Ever Read

I feel silly telling people that this is the best Bestseller I have ever read....because I'm only at chapter 67.

Waaa, 67 already you think? Haha, the last chapter in this book is chapter no 233...they are all in prime numbers la.

If you already know which bestseller I'm referring to, then this is truly a bestseller by word of mouth.

I'm talking about Mark Haddon's [The Curious Incident of The Dog In The Midnight]. I won't attempt to tell you why I think this is the best I ever read because you just have to check it out yourself. It's only 226 page long...and you can't stop once you start (I'm just stopping to blog and tell you about it).

Read it for its totally refreshing and revolutionary style of writing.
Read it for its thought-stimulating insights.
Read it for entertainment.

Excerpts of the day:

"Mrs Forbes at school said that when Mother died she had gone to heaven...

Mrs Peters's husband is a vicar called the Reverend Peters....I asked him where heaven was and he said, 'It's not in our universe. It's another kind of place altogether.'

...I said there wasn't anything outside the universe and there wasn't another kind of place altogether. Except that there might be if you went through a black hole, but a black hole is called a singularity, which means it is impossible to find out what is on the other side because the gravity of a black hole is so big that even electromagnetic waves like light can't get out of it, and electromagnetic waves are how we get information about things which are far away. And if heaven was on the other side of a black hole, dead people would have to be fired into space on rockets to get there, and they aren't or people would notice.

...I think people believe in heaven because they don't like the idea of dying, because they want to carry on living and they don't like the idea that other people will move into their house and put their things into the rubbish.

...What actually happens when you die is that your brain stops working and your body rots, like Rabbit did when he died and we buried him in the earth at the bottom of the garden. And all his molecules were broken down into other molecules and they went into earth and were eaten by worms and went into the plants and if we go and dig in the same place in 10 years there will be nothing except his skeleton left. And in 1,000 years even his skeleton will be gone. But that is all right because he is a part of the flowers and the apple tree and the hawthorn bush now."

That's it for now. Trust the doctor, this is a good book.

Pistachio is Pavarotti

Man, something really F-U-N-N-Y happened to me today.

Was promoting my recital on Friday to my new colleague, G. He said, "Alamak I can't make it la, am leaving for home town on Friday." So I gave him a sneak preview of my performance by singing him a few lines from Rossini's Il Rimprovero .

I also showed him an old leaflet I found in a box sitting under my desk, the Three Sopranos Plus One concert flyer...where Tan Sin Sim sang the same song I'm going to sing. G looked puzzled and fascinated at the same time, he was trying to name Pavarotti but it came out...

"Eh this song is like what that guy sings, that singer, what's his name???? Pis-pistachio?"

I laughed so much then I don't think I could laugh any more later when I relate this story to my friends at rehearsal.

It was funnier then, when it happened.

An Orgy of Updates

Wow, have I been busy or what!

Last week has been interesting, exciting activities couple with lots of migraine attacks.

It's funny that when I need to refer to my organiser/diary most, that's when I forget to update and refer.

The highs and the lows...

1. I was stuck in my parking slot on Monday (I remember I got ready for work extra early that day) because an idiot parked his (WHT 3319, yes I found out from the guard that it's a HE) Proton Saga an inch behind my car. I was a bigger idiot by trying to get out still and got my car scratched...anyway I managed to get to work before ten am, after the car in front of me left.

2. I had five rehearsals in the span of four days and in of them, I was invited to stay back and watched a pedigree bitch get deflowered. PONG's bitch is Olivia and she has black and shiny hair (I have to ask him for the pedigree, I don't know la) and Scott has golden hair and he has a bubbly owner, R.

R arrived with her husband (I think) AND, a, Stud-master, I was told that's what he is, a S-T-U-D-M-A-S-T-E-R. Stud-master assists in canine mating, he wore a rubber glove in his let hand and held a K-Jelly tube in his right...my jaw on the floor and I attempted calling him `Professional Masturbator'. R corrected me and taught me STUDMASTER.

Scott the golden boy was a true professional (he is a champion dog, PONG told me) when it comes to the matters of `love-making'. While I watched in awe I had the informative commentary from R who described the process as `Windows file-transferring' --- you know when the dogs are joined in the ass(es) before the mating is over. Anyway, the bottom line of this story is that, put it crudely, the fuck cost PONG 900 bucks...again my jaw on the floor. "But why not? Scott IS a CHAMPION." Yes, indeed, I do hope Olivia gets pregnant soon.

3. Attended a corporate luncheon on Thursday, it was supposed to be a treat for myself for slaving in front of my PC and fax machine for two projects at work. I arrived at the hotel entrance to get stopped by a guard who held an inspecting mirror to make sure I haven't got a bomb under my car, I had to open the car boot for him to make sure I don't have another bomb there. When I started eating my vegetarian pasta, the mike was passed to a guest giving a tribute speech to an outgoing CEO, I realized I was having lunch with former PM, he was the Special guest...few tables away from mine. He had the whole room of people eating out of his hand, charming speaker.

4. Friday came, we drove to One U for lunch for a change but I ended up paying deposit for YET ANOTHER Beatrice Looi dress. I went back after work and end up with this gorgeous navy blur organza dress, at 30% off and it comes with a matching shawl. It's one of those safe but classy gown, which I will make sure I won't wear only once. This dress will make its debut with me on stage for my performance in La Serenata Musicale this Friday.

5. Watched RiverGrass Dance Academy's graduation performance, Pebbles II. Signal Master did a great job in her solo dance Jaded Innocence. What really threw me off my seat was - I got off my seat during the interval and someone called me, I turned around and found my housemate sitting four rows behind me.

"What the hell you doing here man?"

"My girlfriend's in the show."

I see. So...ok. In fact I saw a lot of the girlfriend on stage after the interval. I think, I hope for better future in my apartment, with a dancer girlfriend who knows my girlfriend Signal Master.

So there, on stage were a girl I met in my guitar class, Signal Master, a girl from my high school (and movie actress also, konon nya) and there, my housemate's girlfriend.

BTW, Rivergrass is a few doors from my sister's Fantasia Music Studio.

6. Sunday morning was unusual for me. Woke up early to pick up D for a recce in Batu Caves, the outdoor location for a shoot. D and I have been assigned photographers for SM's wedding shoot. The climb site is called Damai. Damai was a busy place for some 15 Caucasian kids on morning...got rock-climbing camp that day. A few of ST's climbing friends were there fixing up the equipments and picnic, it sure look like one hell of a fun party for those kids, climbing lime stones and pigging out on sandwiches.

When I was done with my experimental roll of film and were walking towards ST's car, I saw this picture and felt something - two Malay kids resting on one bicycle, watching the white kids (note: the word `white' used here is intended) climbing in their back yard, and having fun. Well, I hope they are also having fun watching. I took two shots of the Malay kids watching the white kids had fun, these two groups of kids were so close in distance, yet so far in social class.

This week is going to be one big furious ball of appointments, rehearsals and work. This time I make sure I use my organiser.

Alternative Lifestyle

Last night, IW and I talked about how marriage, or getting married is coming back into fashion. We decided it's a multi-factorial phenomenon, shift in thoughts, cultures, peer-pressure, herd behaviour. Getting married is cool these days, it's hot, I bought the latest VIDA mag where it has a story on the same topic, I haven't read it myself but I feel it too.

IW's theory is that things around took a turn after Sep 11, she observed people have become more conservative, and paranoia is ringing high.

And on a personal level, since J and I parted for short while (and back again, a month ago), I have developed some kind of weird allergy to couples showing their affection in public....or should I say, in front of me.

I treasure my relationship with J even more now and it's obvious to both of us that we have grown from the break-up experience. Ahem, the break-up has actually done we more good than damage. When we `came back' we got a few things sorted out. One of them is about marriage.

One fine evening just after CNY I found myself at the company of one whole table of happy shinny getting-married people, at a Yu-Shang dinner. IT WAS AN UNFORGETTABLE EXPERIENCE. It pushed me to think about myself and what I want ultimately in my relationship.

I know now what I want. I want the one I love to stay with me for as long as I love him. Sounds pretty selfish? Ask yourself, don't you want the same thing?

And I don't think by getting married it's a sure guarantee of making sure the one you love stays with you forever (nothing is forever, silly). The objective of marriage is blurry for me and these days, nothing is sacred anymore.

So that's it, until I change my mind, it would be alternative life style for me, no marriage, not even the need to talk about it. I see the big picture and that's really good enough for me. The big picture of love (or relationship/partnership) is to be with the person you adore, what has signing a form and exchanging a band got to do with anything?? There's nothing absolutely about anything, a married couple's love is no purer than another unmarried couple's love who have been with each other forever (figure of speech).

Well, but it's coming back in waves and yes, I know of at least 7 lovely couples (my age) getting married this year (and in January).

Me? I will be the lovely unmarried one, for now :)

Sing, sing, sing

Sing-song time....for me! Te Duem auditorium is seriously built for vocal recitals, the acoustics are so fantastic that, it's best that you sit at the end of the hall.

The rehearsals with the singers (Peter n Mei Ling) are so much fun I can't wait for the next project. We had ice cream and watched operas on DVD after rehearsal yesterday and on Wednesday Peter is cooking dinner for rehearsal!!! Man, who says an artist's life is tough? Hehe.

So if you are free to drive down to Puchong on the 25th of this month, I present to you....

La Serenata Musicale

presented by

Cecelia Yap
Ng Chong Lim
Cha Seng Tiang
Loo Bang Hean

La Serenata Musicale - A Musical Eveningbegins its run in 2003 (then known as Musician's Platform), a project organised by Cecelia Yap, Ng Chong Lim and Loo Bang Hean. Its goal is to encourage young musicians to explore and experience performing on stage. The tutors feel that an examination-oriented way of musical education is insufficient to cultivate an all-rounded musician, and have thus started the series of concerts to give aspiring musicians the invaluable opportunity to take part in public performances.

Tutors
Loo Bang Hean - (students) Ng Mun Hong, Chong Mei Ling, Serene She, May Chan Sook Mei
Ng Chong Lim - (students) Kenric Taylor, Yoeh Hao Zhi, Stephanie Tan, Anastasia Abu Bakar
Cecelia Yap - (students) Peter Ong, Kho Mei Ling, John Tan

Guest Artist
Janet Lee Shu Fun (presented by Cha Seng Tiang)

Peter Ngu, pianist

7:45pm
March 25th, 2005 (Friday)
Te Duem Auditorium, No 133, Jalan Kenari 23A, Bandar Puchong Jaya

Contacts for more details
012 2398 668
012 3180 103
012 9181 198
012 2155 783

highlights of

Programme

Piano Recitals

Nocturne No. 4 in E flat major, Op.36 (Faure)
Barcarolle, Op.60 (Chopin)
Etude in F major Op. 72 No. 6 (Moskovski)
Song without words, Op.19 No.3 (Mendelssohn)
Marzuka: C major, Op.67 No.3 (Chopin)
Piano Sonata No. 1 in C major, Op.1 4th movt.: Finale: Allegro co fuoco (Brahms)

Vocal Recitals

Mignon Lied: Kenst du das land (Listz)
Una furtiva lagrima - from the opera L'elisir d'amore (Donizetti)
Per pieta, bell'idol mio (Bellini)
Der Tod und das Madchen (Schubert)
L'alba separa dalla luce l'ombra (Tosti)
Nel ridestarmi (Cilea)

Swanky Do

Let's hope C and CT would report on the Rantau Abang beach cleaning over the weekend. While I was cooing in the soft sheets of Ritz Carlton on Saturday night, my mind was wondering how the cleaning went, sure has been a hell lot of fun.

I told J that when I went the last time, it was very hot and sweaty the whole time but the great fun made up for all that.

We took the opposite turn from the high way back to KL. J couldn't stop running to the toilet every 15 minutes...his face changed every 15 minutes. In the end we gave up and decided to check into luxury for the weekend.

How ironic.

I was supposed to be cleaning beach and giving back to the nature, I ended up on the 16th floor of Ritz slurping on fresh mango juice and wrapped in the comfy soft sheets surfing Astro channels.

We were very impressed. The check-in took 3 minutes, we were led to our room and the bell boy dressed in well-pressed uniform gave us a short speech of what to expect while we were in their good hands...spa, gym, massage, incredibly huge bathroom, butler service, coffee and tea sent to your room by touch of a button, etc.

So to make our stay worth the every cent we paid, we rang the hotel down by asking for everything we could possibly ask for within the next half an hour after we arrived at our room. Ice, batteries for clock, newspapers, food...extra tooth brush. In the first hour of our stay we opened the room door a dozen times, their servicemen were quick. By the 2nd hour, J was all tired up and swear he wouldn't ask for anymore service.

At 3am we both woke up and ordered more food. You see J knocked off at 9pm after his stomach got better. My initial plan of waking him up to go to the streets was short changed when I dozed off at 11pm...

We had a leisurely morning swim, followed by jacuzzi and sauna, and nice hot shower (mind you, the hair conditioner in the hotel works way better than mine) before our breakfast at 10am. The Italian breakfast at Rossini's didn't look anything Italian to me though....not unless you consider Nasi Lemak and Chinese porridge Italian.

We lazed in bed till it was time to check out. J decided this is better than the trouble of going on overseas trip for a quick fix of the mind, just a relaxing (and lazy) weekend over in a swanky do, will do.

And it does wonders for your romance too.

Telawi night

I met an my old buddy from my banking days last night, she now flies about the world (for work) and just got herself this sleek black four-wheel drive.

I like her, she is both your regular high-flying career woman and my funny, laid-back and philosophical chat mate.

We had over-priced Chinese food in Bangsar, steamed eggs (told them NO PORK and they still brought us pork, idiots), asparagus in belacan, Cantonese fried Yee Mee, tofu and salty vege soup. We trotted in and out of all the boutiques in Telawi and decided we are better off shopping in Sungai Wang. Those glittery Bangsar boutiques think we girls are stupid, those cheap Hong Kong imported are at less than half price in Sg. Wang.

After hissing at the over-priced cheap clothes, we climbed into MPH in our tired heels and worked through the CDs and magazines. My damage: UK Harper's Bazaar and a fabulous Dave Brubeck Quartet CD, [Time Out (fea. Take Five and Blue Rondo A La Turk)]. She bought a Best of Village People, thanks to the remix she heard in Blook boutique earlier on.

We needed a sofa, badly.

I wanted Alexis because I had so much memories there but Starbucks' so-called sofa won. After one mango juice, one iced mint tea and one pack of gourmet potato chips we were both knocked out. Feeling like old ladies, we crawled back out to the streets and headed home.

My last two weeks kinda slipped back into my old single days...always buzzing with activities, and girlfriends. I sleep fast and sound at night, feeling `full'.

I hope my man is feeling like that too...sleeping sound and feeling `full'. Love you.

Rent & Hope

Things are going to be different around here...in my apartment.

Two days ago I found a hand written romantic poem on a piece of paper, stuck on the fridge door, with a fridge magnet. This is no ordinary fridge magnet, it's two hearts stuck on each other, with names (of who else, my chief tenant and his beloved) written on it.

I think it means:

1. Keep your distance, janet.
2. We are sooo in love and we are going to be spending a lot of time in this apartment, so keep your distance.

I forgot to look last night whether it's still there...I think it is, no reason why it shouldn't be.

I like that girl, she is cute and soft-spoken, and she seems to be getting sexier each time I see her there, probably feeling a little threatened by my wardrobe (evil laugh).

I really wouldn't mind if they start making out in the living hall, or on the dining table or on the floor, really, I only miss walking from the bathroom in my towel (think it's time to get a bath robe), and wearing my comfy slip in the house. I like this place and I guess it's only wise to assume that this cute girl is the typical insecure and jealous type, who wouldn't do with her boyfriend sharing the same space with a woman who walks out of the bath in towel.

Whatever it is, I hope she goes back into obscurity, like what she did before. I have managed to keep things quite simple, I haven't asked him anything about where was she before and etc.

Whatever...

read something good today, by a friend, JW. On Hope, Redemption And The Power Of The Human Spirit

All Religions Teach Good Things? Then how come....

I finally get to watched [Passion of The Christ], last night, in between my laundry rounds. Now I feel the need to do some research on the historical facts of this man. Any good sites? I guess none, most information or articles written would be biased..depending on the authors.

It sent chills to my spine watching the people carrying out the tasks (more like their hobby, the way it was directed in the movie) of torturing Jesus, those were the same people who believed in God, and their lives governed by religious teachings.

God, I rather not believe in a God if such belief could move me into such cruelty towards another human being...or rather, a human being who claims he is the son of god.

Religion = power = controlling the mass/world
Religion = you don't question, just believe

I don't want to believe, I want to know.

Disturbing.

I'm my own god, my conscience is my temple.

BTW, I don't think it's a good movie, it has very few elements....the goriness kind of wear you out and when you get to the second half, there is really nothing to look forward to anymore. I'm glad we don't kill like that these days...or is there any modern day witch-hunt going on that I don't know about?

(Unfortunately there is still a lot of cruelty towards animals these days, read here)

Next on my staying-home-movie-list:

The Village
Terminal
Breakfast At Tiffany's (all time favourite)
Being Julia

Happy Days or A Day In The Life of A Diva-In-The-Making

Contrary to the post title, I had a bad start for this week, though I'm looking forward to a better week ahead.

My energy is drained thinking about where I could have been in my singing career if not for certain circumstances. At this moment, jealousy is eating me up, wishing I'm in someone else' shoe.

I know, dwelling on circumstances will not get me anywhere.

But I'm cool, Supreme Bitch said I have more character than my `object of obsession'. I will get there, just you wait.

And complication at work (just work) is throwing me off my chair.

Started with migraine this morning and it's still here.

Yes, these days I spend more time thinking about making it in singing. I originally typed `...Diva-Wannabe' then I decided I owe it to myself to consider myself Diva-In-The-Making.

Received a call on Sat night from the Chinese (singing) circle about a role in a year-end Chinese opera. Wow. Too bad for me...if I don't get fired from M production, there's no way I would get permission from M to be involved in another production....how?

A role in a Chinese opera...wow.

I wouldn't having a few more migraines just for that.

My Funny Housemate

Finally, after four months and one day, I met my housemate's girlfriend. I walked into their romantic cinematic (all lights were switched off) on the couch last night.

Everyone's been asking about my chief tenant/housemate's love life. I just never got down in asking him and after a while, I felt it was too awkward too ask. Friends speculated his sexuality (the candles in the apartment) and now I'm proud to present my housemate - heterosexual, after all. Yay.

He was the only one who replied my enquiry through KLUE classifieds. I got there and walked into this incredibly clean apartment with candles, ceiling-high wardrobe and white sofa (!!!!!!). I paid him some deposit right after he walked me to the swimming pool and back to the apartment...it was too good to be left alone. I want that room.

He explained the perks to me and so far they have been realised: he travels for weeks a lot, during which he says I can throw my wild parties (I never do, I think he knew I wouldn't go through the cleaning afterwards); I can use the TV, DVD player, kitchen, vacuum, whenever I want; there's a paid cleaner for the apartment and then there's chocolate whenever he comes back from his glamorous working trips (think Europe and US).

My biggest fear is of course, having to leave this rented home before I get my own place. I often ask him if I make too much noise when he is around, doing whatever I do, singing and watching movies. I have made improvement in the shoe-cabinet, I clean my heels and sandals when I put them back. I'm never late with rent money. I share my food with him...usually after he has eaten (but there was once he just couldn't resist the fragrance of my Aglio Olio he had a small plate though he was full).

And I hope he doesn't suddenly need to marry her and move out of this place, when you have all the good things now it hurts just to think about moving again...

In Love with Bryn Terfel

PORGY:

Oh, I got plenty o' nuttin'
An' nuttin's plenty fo' me.
I got no car, got no mule, I got no misery.
De folks wid plenty o' plenty
Got a lock on dey door.
'Fraid somebody's agoin' to rob 'em
While dey's out amakin' more.
What for?
I got no lock on de door,
(Dat's no way to be)
Dey can steal de rug from de floor..
Dat's okeh wid me,
'Cause de things dat I prize
Like de stars in de skies
All are free.
Oh, I got plenty o' nuttin',
An' nuttin's plenty fo' me,
I got my gal, got my song,
Got Hebben de whole day long!
No use complainin'!
Got my gal, got my Lawd, got my song.

I got plenty o'nuttin',
An' nuttin's plenty fo' me.
I got de sun, got de moon, got de deep blue sea.
De folks wid plenty o' plenty,
Got to pray all de day.
Seems wid plenty you sure got to worry
How to keep de debble away, away.
I ain't afrettin' 'bout hell
Till de time arrive.
Never worry long as I'm well,
Never one to strive to be good, to be bad,
What de hell, I is glad I's alive.
Oh, I got plenty o' nuttin'
An' nuttin's plenty fo' me.
I got my gal, got my song,
Got Hebben de whole day long.
No use complainin',
Got my gal, got my Lawd, got my song!

Like that song, especially the way , Bryn Terfel sings it. Lover-ly.

Tips for singers (Lisan and gang):

Watch great ones in action (DVD will do also), Bryn, Renee Fleming, Sumi Jo...and let their performance do wonder for your singing. Well, at least it has worked for me. My voice seems clear and strong every time after I watch Renee belting out Song To The Moon....talk about creepy, happy creepy!