Alternative Lifestyle

Last night, IW and I talked about how marriage, or getting married is coming back into fashion. We decided it's a multi-factorial phenomenon, shift in thoughts, cultures, peer-pressure, herd behaviour. Getting married is cool these days, it's hot, I bought the latest VIDA mag where it has a story on the same topic, I haven't read it myself but I feel it too.

IW's theory is that things around took a turn after Sep 11, she observed people have become more conservative, and paranoia is ringing high.

And on a personal level, since J and I parted for short while (and back again, a month ago), I have developed some kind of weird allergy to couples showing their affection in public....or should I say, in front of me.

I treasure my relationship with J even more now and it's obvious to both of us that we have grown from the break-up experience. Ahem, the break-up has actually done we more good than damage. When we `came back' we got a few things sorted out. One of them is about marriage.

One fine evening just after CNY I found myself at the company of one whole table of happy shinny getting-married people, at a Yu-Shang dinner. IT WAS AN UNFORGETTABLE EXPERIENCE. It pushed me to think about myself and what I want ultimately in my relationship.

I know now what I want. I want the one I love to stay with me for as long as I love him. Sounds pretty selfish? Ask yourself, don't you want the same thing?

And I don't think by getting married it's a sure guarantee of making sure the one you love stays with you forever (nothing is forever, silly). The objective of marriage is blurry for me and these days, nothing is sacred anymore.

So that's it, until I change my mind, it would be alternative life style for me, no marriage, not even the need to talk about it. I see the big picture and that's really good enough for me. The big picture of love (or relationship/partnership) is to be with the person you adore, what has signing a form and exchanging a band got to do with anything?? There's nothing absolutely about anything, a married couple's love is no purer than another unmarried couple's love who have been with each other forever (figure of speech).

Well, but it's coming back in waves and yes, I know of at least 7 lovely couples (my age) getting married this year (and in January).

Me? I will be the lovely unmarried one, for now :)