Letter ninety-seven - Day two hundred and twenty-nine of your vacation

Dearest J,

Two weeks' break from my letter to you.  I had wanted to write you many times, but found I have nothing `good enough' to tell you - because as usual, in the past two weeks, I missed you too much.

No worries, am putting the misery of missing you into good use.  I have been enjoying my times, just doing things that please me.  Through the things I do for fun, I could see a lot of you in it.  I stopped in a busy mall after running errands, and ordered myself a peanut butter wafer, and sat down to slowly eat it, reading the novel I had with me (the difference between you and I would be you DO finish the novel in a short time).  Yesterday I stopped near your house to have late lunch alone, at the Kanna Curry House.  The banana leaf rice was a good treat, and there were so many cats around to share the food with.

I had a good rehearsal with Cher Siang on Monday.  He worked on my improvisation for the first time.  I got him to help me try singing At Last in different styles.  He asked if I like to sing with some of his piano students, I said Yes Of Course.  I can't imagine not benefiting from singing more with different musicians.

Since Cabaret ended on Sunday, I have been on a tour of what I'd called, a pleasure trip of culture.  Tuesday night I had French movies back to back from 7pm to midnight, with Seeming, TP and Peter.  Last night I went to the Belle du Berry & David Lewis concert, and then to No Black Tie to watch WVC Trio.  David Lewis' gang went over for jamming at NBT.  Tonight am going to the opening of a Bars & Bedrooms at Actors Studio.  I hope to catch two more French movies tomorrow night and one more play on Sunday.

There's something else eating me from inside, the need to perform.  The need to work for a public audience  grows stronger with every show I attended.  Even though I work hard for my private function audiences, I realise that, to keep sane as a performer, I need to work on a concert.  I need gigs.  The last thing I did before I fell asleep last night was making a song list for that gig that I will organise.

Am sure it would be something you understand very well.  These things we do to stay alive, not just merely breathing.  You have your two wheels spinning under you, I have my songs soaring in my head.  Now I have to release the songs from my head, and set them free.  I will make a gig for myself.

With your blessing, this is going to be a great time for living.

Much love,

B