Acting?

Decided to take a break from stressing my brains out, I come to blog.

Over my acting skills, or the lack of it, now. I spent one hour last night at a private rehearsal with my musical director, going over three lines. Just three lines, for about an hour.

I have a 5pm rehearsal today for a gig this Saturday. At 8pm I will go through the wonderful journey of acting rehearsal, till 11pm. The pattern at the rehearsals with Dama has been one good acting rehearsal, one bad acting rehearsal. Meaning if I had gone thro a nightmarish, `off'-day for my acting rehearsal the day before, today's rehearsal has a chance to be better.

My stage manager seems to understand all my struggles at acting. She understands that once I have switched on my `acting' button I could go over and result in a pretentious-overacting-unnatural symptoms.

Let me get over my temporary state of whining about my shortcoming...for maybe one hour or so, before I need to head straight for working-my-ass-off mode because no, can't afford to dwell on it while I have to face co-actors every other day.

Same for the singing front. No time to pick on my shortcomings. Work work work.

Am told today that I've been a source of positive energy to someone, someone close. How with the wealth of that -- being someone else' sunny Buddha, how can I feel bad about my weaknesses?

I want to celebrate also, the fact that some perceive me of being a persistent worker. Though I think I know that better...that I'm not really that ambitious and I'm not at all as hardworking as some people think I am.

Maybe if they believe hard enough, I will become what they think I am.