Quote from [My Year Of Meats] by Ruth Ozeki (FB post)

Fresh off two separate Jane Goodall's outings last week; having just finished reading Ruth Ozeki's [My Year Of Meats] (definitely not what I expected when I started); and halfway watching Leonardo D's [Before The Flood] documentary; and also signed up to go to the Cowspiracy Screening by Malaysian Nature Society - I am juggling between trouble-shooting at work and self-reflective mode. The need to balance work and life, rest and work, and to simplify, and empathise. 

I will take my time to organise my thoughts of them all in due time, in the meantime I am compelled to remind us, an excerpt from Ozeki's novel, in the second last chapter of [My Year Of Meats]: 

"I would like to think of my 'ignorance' less as a personal failing and more as a massive cultural trend, an example of doubling, or psychic numbing, that characterises the end of the millennium. if we can't act on knowledge, then we can't survive without ignorance. So we cultivate the ignorance, go to great lengths to celebrate it, even. The faux-dumb aesthetic that dominates TV and Hollywood must be about this. Fed on a media diet of really bad news, we live in a perpetual state of repressed panic. We are paralysed by bad knowledge, from which the only escape is playing dumb. Ignorance becomes empowering because it enables people to live. Stupidity becomes proactive, a political statement. Our collective norm." 

#reading #reflecting #goodreads #RuthOzeki #janetwrites #books #novels#JaneGoodall

Workout diary: Session #24, July 16th

a) warm up @ 7 min jogging

b) Pull down @ 18kg @ 15 reps x 5 sets
Bicep curl @ 14 lbs @ 15 reps x 5 sets

c) chest press @ 18kg + triceps dips x 4 sets @ 15 reps

d) dead lift @ 18kg @ 12 reps + squats @ 15 lbs @ 15 reps x 4 sets

e) walking lunges @ 14 lbs x 4 sets

Workout diary: Session #23, July 9th

a) warm up - jogging @ 6min

b) squats @ 15 reps @ 15 lbs x 5 sets

c) calf raise @ 8 lbs @ 30 reps x 5 sets

d) walking lunges with shoulder press x 18 lbs x 4 sets

e) side plank @ 20 reps x 4 sets

superman plank @ 6 lbs @ 20 reps x 4 sets

Workout diary: Session #22, July 8th

a) warm up @ jogging @ 6min

b) pulldown @ 18kg @ 15 reps x 4 sets
rowing @ 16 lbs @ 15 reps x 4 sets

c) lateral raise @ 16 lbs @ 15 reps x 4 sets
reverse fly @ 8 lbs @ 15 reps x 4 sets

d) push up - variations: diamond / normal / wide @ 10 reps x 4 sets

e) ankle reach (oblique) left and right @ 10 reps x 3 sets

f) twist sit up - left and right @ 10 reps x 3 sets

g) sit-up @ 20 reps x 3 sets

Workout diary: Session #21, July 4th

I spent the weekend dragging my sore body all over town.  Sargent up my game on Friday with weights level I've never been before, though it was tough during the class...I didn't see the impact coming, till right after class at my steering wheels...woooaah, my arms just 'died' and the following day the `fun' begins.  He replied my whatsapp message "Aiyayai, you rest up ya...yup, today memang nak push you to the new limit..."

Yup, it was the day it looked like the bar was gonna crash on me in the crazy clean and jerk!

a) warm up @ 5 min

b) Clean & Jerk @ 4 sets @ 15kg

c) Arnold press @ 16 lbs + lateral raise @ 12 lbs + reverse fly @ 8 lbs x 10 reps x 4 sets

d) squats @ 30 lbs @ 15 reps x 4 sets (killer...mofo) 

e) calf raise @ 30 reps x 4 sets

g) dead lift (heaviest ever for me) @ 25kg x 4 sets @ 15 reps

CAYA LAH!  woooooot...hooked on pain, this little mad bitch in me...

Workout diary: Session #20, July 1st

Had a nice portion of breakfast an hour before the session, of eggs, bread and butter.  But at the start of the walking lunges I got dizzy and had to sit out the last 2 sets :( Sargent had to rescue me by getting me sugary drinks from the vending machine...to think that was the start of Ramadan and I had wanted to not drink for an hour during the workout.

a) warm-up @ jogging @ 7mins

b) pulldown @ 5 sets @ 15 reps @ 18kg

c) push-ups @ 5 sets @ 15 reps

d) lunges @ 2 sets @ 15 lbs

e) jumping squats @ 2 sets @ 15 reps

"died" during the walking lunges and jumping squats, so Sargent Naim had to switch exercise to planks...

f) side plank @ 3 sets of 15 reps

g) side sit-up @ 3 sets of 20 reps

h) sit-ups @ 3 sets of 20 reps

i) jogging @ 5 mins

Workout diaryy: Session #19, June 25th

Focus: upper body training 

a) warm up @ jogging @ 6min

b) pulldown 

- front pulldown @ 15 reps x 3 sets - weights: 14kg (1 set), 18kg (2 sets)

- back pulldown @ 15 reps x 3 sets - weights: 14kg (1st & 2nd set), 18kg (3rd set)

c) Rowing @ 4 sets @ 15 reps @ 18 lbs

d) reverse fly @ 4 sets @ 15 reps @ 8 lbs

e) Arnold press @ 4 sets @ 15 reps @ 16 lbs 

f) front raise @ 3 sets @ 15 reps @ 16 lbs

g) bicep curl @ 3 sets @ 15 reps @ 18 lbs 

h) sit-ups - side 

- 10 reps @ left & right @ 4 sets

- normal sit-up @ 10 reps @ 4 sets

Workout diary: Session #18, June 20th

a) Warm up @ 5min jog on treadmill

b) Clean & Jerk @ 5 sets:
  1-3rd set @ 12 reps @ 14 lbs
  4th & 5th set @ 10 reps @ 20 lbs

c) Push ups @ 3 sets of 30 reps - variations: diamond, normal, wide

d) Walking lunges with bicep curls - 3 sets of 20 steps @ 16 lbs

e) Sit-ups @ 4 sets of 15 reps

Workout diary: Session #17, June 17th

a) Warm up - 6 min

b) Walking lunges with shoulder press @ 20 steps x 4 sets

c) Jumping squats - 15 reps x 4 sets

d) Pull down @ 18kg x 4 sets

e) Bicep curls @ 14 lbs @ 15 reps x 4 sets

f) Shoulder press - 18 lbs @ 12 reps x 4 sets & lateral raise - 8 lbs @ 12 reps x 4 sets

g) Sit-up - 30 reps x 4 sets (mix of normal sit-up and side)

Workout diary: Session #15, June 6 + Session #16, June 10

Didn't take any diary for session #15 ;p

Session # 16 was a level up for me, Sargent Naim said "Ah today we are going to do tougher exercises.."

a) Warm up - jogging of 6 min

b) Clean & Jerk - Sargent explained to me what's involved and he let me did the first set of 10 reps without saying much, it was a bitch of course...my wrist wanted to give way to the bar when I lifted it to my shoulder and up to a shoulder press.

"You see I wanted you to learn the hard way...before I let you in on the trick of this exercise, on how to `cheat'!"  .......

He showed me the routine again with the proper usage of momentum to enable the lifting/pulling of the bar into a smooth transition into the next movement - a deep squat with the bar lifted on shoulder level, and in the exhalation shift from deep squat into standing position and propel the barbell upward into a shoulder press.

Felt like magic, haha...now that feels like a bit like dancing, getting the momentum right then the routine become possible to do, I  told Sargent.

So that's 10 reps in one set, I did 5 sets of that, the last set with increased repetition to 15.  The barbell was 10kg.

c) Walking lunges - 20 steps x 5 sets @ 14kg -- this is my absolute pet dislike exercise....so I put on music on my iPod to ease the boring routine while Sargent went on counting and making a clown of himself, tickling me to laughter while I juggled lunging and holding on to the dumbbells.

d) Shoulder press @ 16 pounds + lateral raise @ 8 pounds x 4 sets @ 12 reps

e) superman plank @ 20 reps x 4 sets @ 6 pounds

f) Leg raise @ 15 reps x 3 sets  -- I had to do something extra yesterday with this routine, adding a tummy crunch and lift both legs high up and reach from pelvis to touch Sargent's hands where he was standing in front of me.  A killer for the abs ...necessary evil I guess.

g) Normal sit-up @ 15 reps x 4 sets

Workout diary: Session #14, June 3

Poor Sargent was out of action for a week due to a fall in a drain (!!!!!) in a heavy downpour...his wound was infected.

a) Jog @ 5 min 

b) Pull down -- 4 sets 

1st set @ 14kg @ 20 reps

2nd - 4th set @ 18kg @ 15 reps

c) bend over roll -- 4 sets 

1st set @ 20 reps @ 16 pounds

2nd - 4th set @ 15 reps @ 18 pounds

d) reverse fly -- 4 sets 

1st set @ 20 reps @ 8 pounds

2nd - 4th set @ 15 reps @ 8 pounds

e) shoulder press @ 15 reps @ 16 pounds

+ lateral raise @ 15 reps @ 8 pounds

f) superman plank with dumbbells @ 8 pounds @ 20 reach x 4 sets

g) side crunch + normal sit-ups @ 20 reps x 4 sets

Workout diary: Session #13, May 23rd

a) warm up - 5 min jog

b) squats - 20 reps, (I have been spelling this wrong and I had no idea - that 'squad' is not 'squat'!!!) walking lunges - 10 steps, calf raise - 30 reps -- all with 9 pounds each arm, 3 sets

c) side plank @ 15 reps + hip abduction @ 20 reps -- 4 sets

d) side crunch @ 10 reps + sit-ups @ 12 reps  -- 4 sets

e) jog @ incline 3% - 5 min

Workout diary: Session #12, May 21st

Sargent Naim upped my game today! Adding on weights for my pull-down exercises and I quite..almost didn't flinch the whole time, ALMOST :)

a) Warm-up jogging @ 5min @ 4mph

b) Pull-down (back and front) & shoulder press
1st set pull down @ 14kg @ 40 reps
2nd set pull down @ 18kg @ 30 reps
3rd set pull down @ 23kg @ 16 reps
4th set pull down @ 18kg @ 30 reps
5th set pull down @ 14kh @ 40 reps

Shoulder press of 5 sets @ 15 reps each, with dumbbells @ 12 pounds, 14 pounds, 16 pounds


c) Push-ups (5 sets @ 15 reps) and climbers (5 sets of 20 reps)

d) Sit-up and glut (hamstring exercise - new) - 4 sets of 15 reps

e) Lunges with weights (20 steps @ 4 sets @ 18 pounds) and calf raises (4 sets of 30 reps)


Lunch after workout today was super delicious, Sargent took me to a Rojak stall near the gym.  "The Chinese aunty's fruits rojak is damn good!"  Not really a fruits Rojak fan, but I ordered a box for myself anyway, with chilies and extra crackers, and a bottle of fresh coconut water.  The rojak was sooooo good that I had to stop my car at the side of the road and finished it there and then :)  ...then again, I know, so far all my meals right after the workout taste REALLY good.

Well then, another fruits rojak with chilies for me this Friday.

Workout training diary: Session #11, May 16th

I told Sargent that am getting lazier with my training diary...guess what, we didn't make the diary again after class.  He had a new client, a newsreader lady, she had her session right after my class and I finished late so I had to rush off to make way for her class to start - so no diary.

what I remember

a) Warm up - 5 min jog on the treadmill @ 4mph

b) pull down, 14kg x 20 reps x 1 set
then 18kg x 15 reps x 3 sets

c) bicep curls - 10 reps x 5 sets @ 9 pounds each hand

d) Superman plank - 4 sets of 20 reps

e) Sit-ups - 4 sets of 15 reps

f) lateral raise...

g) the killer...shoulder press with dumbbells, can't remember the weights, but it wasn't nice.  So nasty that Sargent had to assist me on the last 2 sets.

I have never looked at myself in the mirror this much, this obsession of toning makes me feel vain and at the same time, relieved to know that am able to face my own vanity.

I was told that the body-toning/transformation may be slower for me due to my vegetarian diet - intake of protein may not be enough...so I bought more tempeh this morning at the market.  Will add in a lot more tofu and beans in my menu.  Sargent will bring me some protein-shake samples to try at my next session - that should supplement my lack of protein for my post work-out meals.

...all in all, I do notice the tiny changes in my arms, shoulders and abs.  The indigestion and bloating situation has improved a little - am guessing it's due to my overall attention to eating and toilet schedule - doesn't look like it's the effect of the expensive probiotics that I started taking.  The improvement came after I started training in April, whereas I've started taking probiotics a month before that.

Food never tasted better after I started weight-trainig :)

Guess am a converted pain-junkie :)

Workout training diary: Session #10, May 13th

a) warm up jogging - 5 min - 4mph :)

b) dead lift (30 pounds x 15 reps x 5 sets) and
squads - 30 pounds x 15 reps x 5 sets

c) lunges with shoulder press (DIED!!!) - started with 18 pounds dumbbells, then 16 pounds - Sargent Naim had to give me lighter weights after one set because I just couldn't carry on with the 18-pound shoulder press in lunges...4 sets

d) push-ups, 20 reps x 4 sets

e) sit-ups, 5 sets of 15 reps

Workout training diary: Session #9, May 9th

a) 5 min jog on treadmill

b) squads & walking lunges
1st set - 20 squads with 18 pounds
2nd - 4th set @ 20 reps with 14kg dumbbells

c) push ups - 4 sets of 15 reps (angled) + leg raise @ 20 reps x 4 sets

d) calf raise - 4 sets of 30 reps

e) side sit-ups - 4 sets of 20 reps
normal sit-ups - 4 sets of 12 reps

f) jumping squads - 4 sets of 15 reps

next session - Tuesday, May 12th :)


The jumping squad was a killer, took me a bit of time to get the posture and body right.  The weekend followed with aches all over...subsided on late Sunday..

Workout training diary: Session #7, May 2nd

a) warm up jogging of 5-min

b) push-ups - 10 reps x 5 sets

c) chest press (on machine...killer for me) - 15 reps x 4 sets (14kg)

d) Arnold press - 10 reps x 5 sets (4 pounds each hand)

e) lateral Raise - 15 reps x 4 sets (4 pounds each hand)

f) triceps dips - 10 reps x 4 sets

g) sit-ups - 10 reps x 4 sets

h) crunches - 15 reps x 3 sets

i) plank (Superman) - 20 reps 7 4 sets


Sargent injured himself on Sunday night at football, hope he gets some help soon.  Sessions on delay...

Workout training diary: Session #4, April 14th

a) Warm up - 5-min jog on trade mill

b) Pull down weight machine:
1set of 20-reps @ 14kg
2nd set of 15-reps @ 18kg
3rd set & 4th set of 12-reps @ 18kg

c) Squads: 5 sets
1st set @ 20-reps with body weight
2nd set @ 15-reps with 16 pounds
3rd - 5th set @ 12-reps with 30 pounds

d) Walking lunges:
4 sets of 30-steps with 18 pounds weight
alternate each set with shoulder press of 15-reps with 12 pound dumbbells

e) Girl Push-ups & Planks:
15-reps of 4 sets of push-ups
and
4 sets of 30-second of planks

f) Sit-ups: 5 sets
15-reps each set

Today I taught Sargent Naim how to count in French :) He sang a short song in Kelantanese for me, hehe.

Next session: April 17th, Thursday

What lies beneath the MAC foundation...

Make-up is something you put on your face.  To hide things.  Among other things.

I got up late this morning.  A phone call from Mama got me out of bed.  I cleaned my sleepy face with water and pat it dry and look into a mirror at myself and look, I looked at its reflection long and hard.

This face doesn't look anything like the one on stage last night.  I was belting out happy tunes and when I walked into the audience to sing, a lady whispered loudly to me over the music and say, "You are so beautiful."

Good make-up hides many things.  Signs of aging, results of lack of sleep, not-so-flawless complexion, a skin break out, etc...a bad life style.

It's karma all right, what you do to your body (or not do to your body) will manifest and sprout signs of bad karma all over your...your face.

That's my morning today.  Part one of the story was my dream.  I was idling in a house, it felt like both my house back home at parents' and J's house.  It felt like days after a funeral, my folks milling about doing chores, or some cooking, something...to try to get back into some normality of life. There were visitors around whom we were trying to send them back to their normal lives too, arranging transportations.  I remember desperately trying to help a lady go back to Johor Bahru.

I remember telling my dad (or was it his dad) that my big iMac has stopped working but I would like to use the big screen on a new computer.  I remember walking out to a wet market, a square that I have never seen in my life and watch trucks driving away with their wares and little wind of dusts circling round and round the square.

A few moments later I notices a change of time - it signalled to me as the end of a school break and school season was starting.  I saw droves of school buses full of kids in blue and white school uniforms driving into the market place, I saw a private car driving towards me, in it sat a parent and his two teenage school-going boys.

I wish somehow by strange fate, or some out of the planet (out of the dream) magic would bring him back to life.  I told myself it doesn't matter even if he doesn't know me or love me.  Maybe he could come back as his silly and younger self, like that uniform-clad school boy in that car.  I don't mind.

I stood there with emotions and stared, stunned by what I felt.  Then my phone rang and I woke up.

It was Mama.  I was part relieved, part happy to see the caller ID on my phone.  It was like she got summoned to get me out of that poignant, melancholic situation.  She called to tell me that she's made some fried peanuts with ikan bilis and want me to have some.  She offered soup.  She knew I have a show today.  She asked me if I have time to go over to drink the soup and take the peanuts home.

This would be another long day out on the field, doing my thang...like how he used to put it, he liked watching me doing my things: singing class, rehearsals, talk a lot...singing, hair appointments..

Lunch at Mama's, singing class with Cecilia at 1pm, hair appointment at 3pm, sound check at 5pm, vegetate till showtime at 830pm, catch a show at No Black Tie at 10pm.

The signs of undesirable life style is showing on my face.  Late late nights, skipped meals.  Mainly just these two vices, big ones.

I have to tell myself I have to keep this body well, for him...because the music has to keep playing.

Routines and bag habits are tough to break.  But the hard work has to start somewhere doesn't it?

I'm happy because I sing

"I don't sing because I'm happy; I'm happy because I sing." - William James (1842 - 1910), American psychologist & philosopher

I started using this quote on my name cards a few years ago, and when I started blogging I use it as tag line too. I never really put much thought in how the quote relates to me, except how clever it is and how I know it describes exactly what I do too.

Only when J start to tell me how happy I look whenever I sing, I realise that it's something that happens naturally and I never notice it myself.

Anyway, my voice is finally back to normal and my bad cold has subsided. Am back in business.

An event agent said something funny to me earlier..."Haiya Janet of course you are happy because you sing, because you get paid to sing mah, of course la you happy."

I replied (an attempt to be clever about it) saying people want to pay me to sing because when I sing am happy, hence spreading joy and happiness to the people. -- so while am at it, I better make some bucks to pay bills...

Has it ever struck you? That we pay for art & entertainment to be touched emotionally, for that immaterial satisfaction? I guess many of us don't realise it, music is the medicine, the vitamin & minerals for the soul. Our minds and hearts reach for it, we just don't think about it consciously.

Ok now, that aside....maybe one day soon I will think about having some sort of plan for my future (my hairstylist Sam asked me during my last appointment with him, whether I plan to perform till old or would I be planning to start a singing school or some sort in future), of course I'd love to sing till old old age but don't know if that's good enough a plan -- will people still pay to watch an old lady sing if she isn't the likes of Ella Fitzgerald or Edit Piaf?

I don't know, really. I don't have any plans except to just keep singing...