Letter forty-nine - Day fifty-seven of your vacation

Dearest J,

Am listening to Eddie Reader's Roses, a song introduced by Seeming recently.

Love is all around feel it in the breeze

Summer’s comin round dressing up the trees

And it makes me feel alright

Watching all the signs of passing time

Seasons going round, digging in their heels

Open up your heart to the passing time

Clear yourself a path you can leave behind

Leave a lot of love in each heart you find

Open up your arms to the passing time

Roses in the ground growing in the fields of summer light

Showers falling down,

all is as it seems

If it makes you feel alright

Don’t regret a thing you leave behind

Love is growing wild.. out in summer fields

Have not been eating good and sleeping enough.  The last two nights have been good though, Sunday night I slept before 12am.  Last night I turned off the light at 12am.

I realised I have to make a better effort to eat properly, I owe it to many friends to do it.  There was money collected during your wake.  After the funeral I got a big bag of groceries from Tania, bought with the money they collected, they being the usual suspects of...I don't know else who put in the pool, Nell, Peter, TP, Kin Meng, Chels...Tania, Melissa...duno who else.

And a month later Tania passed me a bunch of cash from her `Janet's grocery wallet', the leftover cash from the pool they collected.  She said she was done carrying two wallets around with `my money' in it so she told me to just take the money and buy myself food to eat.

So I better buck up and have regular meals.

Something weird happened yesterday, actually Sunday.  I went to your place on Sunday evening, saw a cat there...but didn't see Hilary anywhere.  That cat hung around and I look at it and wonder, where is Hilary and who is this cat?

Monday night I was at your house again and that cat was there still, I looked closely and checked the tail this time.  Lo and behold, that's our Hilary.  The crooked tail and the `sore-throat' meowing.  Shocked I was...Hilary has ballooned in just a week, I haven't been to your place for a week during the workshop.  She is so...round now that I couldn't recognize her.  Shocking that it took me two days to recognize her.

Cher Siang came over on Sunday morning to visit Thursday.  He took a liking in her quick.  A feisty little lady he called her.  I took him to the vegetarian Indian place to have breakfast.  He passed me a few books to read.

Ok, there's tons of papers here to be filed and I better be making a to-do-list now for the week.  The flat is clean now and am in the mood to clear away papers so I can work better.

Changed the sheets earlier...I've been sleeping in the middle of the bed.  In the morning I usually end up curling over at your side, looking out at your side of the window - also because that is the window the sun doesn't glare.  I always lie there for a few minutes just concentrating on the memory of you.

Much love, 

B